How Letting Go Can Lead to Big Wins and Even Bigger Smiles
Mel Robbins' latest book, The Let Them Theory, introduces the art of letting others be themselves without interference. For those in long-term recovery, this idea isn’t new. It’s a tool we’ve relied on to stay honest, accountable, and sober. But are we still using it where it matters most?
In recovery, you learned to accept people as they are, not as you wish them to be. This mindset helped lower stress, focus on personal growth, and navigate life without old habits. However, as professional and personal demands grow, it’s easy to lose sight of these principles.
The Cost of Forgetting
When you let go of the "letting go" mindset, the impact is noticeable:
- Stuck in Routine: The systems keeping you sober might now feel like limitations. Holding on too tightly can stall professional growth. Trusting others with tasks can free you to focus on bigger priorities.
- The Need to Fix: Over-correcting or micromanaging not only exhausts you but undermines your credibility. Leadership thrives on allowing others to learn and grow through experience.
- Irritability: Clients, colleagues, or employees pushing your buttons? That frustration often reflects unmet expectations—a reminder to release control and "let them."
- Personal Spillover: Stress at work rarely stays there. It affects your relationships, well-being, and peace of mind. The calm you worked so hard to build can feel distant.
My "Let Them" Moment
I’ve been there. An employee crossed a clear boundary, and instead of calmly applying consequences, I lost my cool (red face, finger pointing and all!) My frustration led to shame and blame, creating unnecessary tension. Later, I realized I could have calmly addressed the issue and stuck to the agreed-upon plan. This reminded me: enforcing boundaries doesn’t require anger, just consistency and integrity.
The Opportunity in Letting Go
Letting others be themselves doesn’t mean letting things slide—it means fostering trust and space for growth. Here’s how to apply the "Triple A" formula:
- Awareness: Recognize when you’re holding on too tightly or reacting emotionally.
- Acceptance: Understand that others may not meet your expectations, and that’s okay.
- Action: Choose calm, intentional responses that align with your values and goals.
When you reconnect with these tools, the benefits are immense. You reclaim time and energy, strengthen relationships, and create space for collaboration. Trusting your team and process often leads to surprising and brilliant results.
Reflect and Reconnect
The tools for effective leadership are already in your hands. Reflect on where unnecessary stress is creeping in. Allow others to grow—even through mistakes. Commit to showing up as a calm and steady leader. Doesn’t that sound better than living in micromanagement mode?
Ready to Walk the Talk?
You’ve mastered these skills in recovery. Are you applying them in your professional life? Take my quiz to find out where you’re thriving and where there’s room to grow. Let’s make sure you’re leveraging these tools to their fullest potential—and having fun while doing it.
Click HERE to take the Expert Integrity Quiz and see how well you walk what you talk. (or used to anyway)
